Areas of expertise

You wanted me to back off.
I was getting way to close for you to handle.
Too many laughs,
too much complicity,
too much chemistry,
too much common ground to find love.
The truth is: you'll never know how good it could have been.
I would have made you feel there's nothing closer to perfection than you.
I would have kissed every pain, every bad memory away.
We would have laughed ourselves to sleep, enjoyed every story the other had to tell.
We could have traveled the world, speak every language that has ever been spoken.
You would have taught me what happiness is.
Now don't you dare complaining -there won't be any second chances.
The thing is: I never look back.
That is something I'm an expert at.

____

Áreas de expertise:

Tú quisiste que retrocediera.
Me acerqué más de lo que podías manejar.
Demasiadas risas,
demasiada complicidad,
demasiada química,
demasiadas cosas en común para encontrar el amor.
La verdad es que nunca sabrás lo bueno que lo nuestro hubiera podido ser.
Yo te habría hecho sentir que no hay nada más cercano a la perfección que tú.
Yo te habría sanado de todos los dolores, habría borrado cada mal recuerdo.
Habríamos reído hasta caer dormidos y disfrutado cada historia que el otro tiene para contar.
Habríamos viajado por el mundo y hablado cada idioma jamás hablado.
Tú me habrías mostrado como es la felicidad.
Ahora no te quejes, que no habrá segundas oportunidades.
El asunto es que yo nunca miro hacia atrás.
En eso soy experta.

it's almost funny

It looks like my life is empty but I  have more lovely people in my life than I can even count.
I have more than enough things to do so I can keep myself busy.
... and nonetheles I'm all the time chasing after you.

Why the hell did you have to show up and turn my life upside down?

I can't stand this silence, I really need you laugh breaking the steel of this emptiness. 


I think of you and the odds are high you are now somewhere else cuddling in her flawless arms while I'm dying here just to be able to lay my eyes on you. I don't care, and I don't need anything but your presence, just that would suffice.
I now have no choice but putting  together the few pieces of memories with you I've got.  and reconstructing your presence in an imaginary you. I go step by step trying to make this illusion of you as perfect as you are.
I start with your lips, your plump, sweet, soft lips. I love them because of the words that come from them and shoot straight into my heart, those words that confirm you are the greatest man alive.
Then, I remind of this admiration I have for you. The ease with which you carry yourself, this friendly, open, real-cool ways make me think you are unique, particularly with me wanting to disappear all the time when people are around,  you make me think I could learn much more from you than you could ever learn from me.
Eyes closed for a second: I remind of the touch of your body close to mine. That nearness of you that fills me with warmth and makes me feel so small and I know for sure that I could stay there forever.
Finally I think of all those things that make me the happiest person on earth just in a millisecond and that keep coming to my mind over and over: the reflection of your green-ish eyes,  the tiniest smile, the way you smell or the way you flick your hair.

Now writing this I realized what is it that I like the most about you: you make me feel the purest love I've ever felt, sweet, young, fresh, new love. So that's why I don't care if nothing ever happens, I'm just glad I now know my heart is not completely dead.

Núm3r0s.

Te acabo de ver y ya estoy contando los segundos para volver a verte.
Faltan:
doscientos sesenta y dos mil ochocientos,
doscientos sesenta y dos mil setecientos setenta y nueve,
doscientos sesenta y dos mil setecientos setenta y ocho...
Hasta a contar estoy aprendiendo por ti.

Por favor, quédate en mi vida cuando se haya acabado el tiempo. 

Warning

Don't you dare falling in love with me.
My ice-cold heart is going to smash yours into the tiniest pieces

Unless you melt it...

Just the opposite of the song

Cuz now I have my heart set on you.

Just in case

just in case you happen to click your way here:

Hello, hello it's me, I've got something on my mind that I need to say. But words, they weigh me down like I'm all alone, standing in a crowd. I need you here, I need you now, I'm wading in a river, Could you come around? and save me now.
I lie awake, I cannot sleep, every time I close my eyes I see you in front of me. You are my heart, you give me strenght, I can't imagine what I'd do without you in my life. I need you here, I need you now, I'm swimming on a river and I don't know how, so save me now.
As the world goes racing by I feels like I've been left behind and no matter how I try, I need you to get me by.

Sanar de mi

Tantas veces me vi escapando de pesadillas que indefectiblemente volvían a encontrarme. Otras tantas  pensé que esconderme sería el mejor remedio para que nada ni nadie me pudiera alcanzar.
Entonces no sabía que de quien debía esconderme, era de mi.

Miedos

Cuando la locura me invade no puedo sino llorar. La muy maldita sólo aparece cuando no hay nadie que pueda venir en mi ayuda, entonces cierro los ojos y cubro mis oídos para que no pueda colarse en mí.

Si me atrapa es como estar al borde de un abismo y que sólo falte un paso para caer describiendo un espiral eterno que nunca llegará al fondo.

No quiero volver a quedarme sola.

...y nos reímos todo el tiempo, las caras sonrientes disfrazan nuestras mentes idiotas y miopes.

No, no somos especiales.